Play Your Ace


“Come on Brooke, it’ll be fun!” I sighed and rolled my eyes for what felt like the dozenth time that day. When Mia got an idea in her head, she was hard-pressed to change her mind.

“I just don’t see why we can’t have a sleepover at your place while watching horror films all night like we always do for Halloween. That’s fun, and it’s tradition!”

“But that’s kid stuff now, Brooke! Come oooooooon! They say the old Milligan house is actually haunted! The lock doesn’t latch right and kids sneak in there all the time! They say it’s scary as shit! My sister swears she felt a cold wind on the stairs and heard whispers in the back bedroom. She said it was super spooky!”

Honestly, I didn’t really have any qualms about some innocent B&E to take a look around a creepy location. And I sure as shit wasn’t scared. I’d always prided myself as somewhat of a horror-genre afficionado. It actually sounded kind of fun. The problem was that Mia’s sleepovers, while being filled with way more crush-talk than I cared to tolerate in a single evening, were a girl-only affair and relatively harmless. If anyone got a bit too close and cozy I could at least zip up into the protective shell of a sleeping bag to give me a bit of space. But I knew that this little haunted house excursion she had planned was going to be different. She’d invited a small group from school… guys included. And knowing Mia…

She’d been only too forthcoming all week about her suspicions that Dax Westfall from our Chemistry class kept “giving me that look” and pestering me “how I felt about it.” And I kept dodging the topic, because just like every time she brought up talking about her latest crush-of-the-week, and asked me the burning question, “Oh Brooke, who are you into?” and I answered honestly by saying no one, she always got this piercing look in her eye and asked, “Why are you holding out on me? I’m your best friend, aren’t I? Can’t you trust me, of all people?” It wasn’t like I was lying. I’d never considered Dax, or any other guy in our class — or girl for that matter — as anything more than a friend. I just… don’t get crushes. I don’t even watch Supernatural and think to myself, like every other female on the planet, “OHMYGODINEEDSAMANDDEANSBABIESNAO!” I have never been that way. Sometimes, I feel like my lack of romantic grandeur seems to be a personal offense to Mia, who has so many teen idol posters plastered around her room I can’t even keep all the groups straight anymore. And I do try. She is my friend, after all.

I was still hesitant. “Who all is going? You know I–”

“–Don’t like big groups, I know, I know. I only invited a few people, Brooke. Haunted houses are better when you don’t have a large group anyway. We’re meeting at 9 p.m. in front of the Milligan house. Please come!”

I felt so utterly defeated. “Okay, but if it’s lame, I’m not going to stay.”

“Oh, you think you’re going to get scared?”

“Ha, ha.”

“Oh, and wear your costume!”

“To go through a musty old house?”

“But… it’s Halloween!”

…I couldn’t argue with that.

I had to admit, the old Milligan house looked slightly foreboding against the cloudy evening sky.

…But nothing felt as foreboding as the fact that Mia had, indeed, invited along Dax, as I had suspected.

“It looks even creepier up close,” Mia commented as she stared up at the rickety mansion.

“If it’s this creepy on the outside, just imagine what it must be like on the inside,” Nathan smirked as he clicked on the flashlight.

Sure enough, the lock was rusted through and the door pushed right open.

“Woah, look at this place! You’d think this was actually a spooky mansion staged for the season, but this is… well… the real deal!” Dax remarked as he gazed at the dusty interior.

“Oh God… is that a rusted shovel hanging on the wall next to a gargoyle? Why would someone put that there? Guys? Guuuuys?” Mia was already clearly freaking out, her bunny ears quivering on top of her head.

“Yoshi, this is pretty scary… you’re going to protect me, right?” Jayla had wasted no time to use the situation to start clinging to her boyfriend.

“Y-Ya, of course. You know I’ll protect you, babe.”

“You’re looking a little tense yourself, bro,” Nathan quipped over his shoulder before proclaiming, “Woooah, guys, check this out!”

There was a collective gasp as the flashlight illuminated a small alcove from the hallway.

“Eww, let’s get out of here!” Mia said, poking Nathan on the shoulder to press forward.

“Hey, Nate, shine the light over here!” As the flashlight filled the study with light, Mia approached a desk. “Woaaaaah, there is some sort of case file here! Jeffrey Rowe, tried for murder… Guys, listen to this!”

As interesting as Mia’s discovery must have been, my attention was focused on what I swore was the sound of creaking floorboards coming directly above us, causing me to jump slightly.

“You okay?” Dax asked, reaching out to take my hand. “It’s pretty awful isn’t it, what that man did to his daughter.”

“Huh? Oh. Ya.” What? I jerked slightly at the sudden contact, fingers laced with my own. It felt… odd. My brain was trying to catch up. As my eyes glanced over at Jayla and Yoshi enjoying tightly gripping each others’ hands and giving each other googly eyes, it just made me realize even more how much I really wasn’t enjoying having that hand holding my own, even though it was warm and gentle and comforting. I suddenly felt guilty. You should be fine with this, so why aren’t you?

Disgusted with myself, I shook off Dax’s grip and hurried into the next room, needing to clear my head.

“Brooke?”

Dax was on my heels. I wanted to scream, and the haunted house had nothing to do with it.

“Heh, let them have some alone time,” I could hear Mia’s voice say from the other room. I swear I could actually hear her winking.

“Oooooh,” Yoshi said. “Riiiiiiiiight.” There was a fake cough. “So did they ever find the body…?”

“Are you all right?”

I let out an exasperated sigh.

“I’m fine. This musty air is just giving me a headache.”

“Are you sure this place isn’t just giving you the creeps? It’s okay to be scared, Brooke. Even someone like you can get scared sometimes. It’s kinda cute.”

I felt petrified when Dax’s arm went around me. My whole body turned to stone and my heart started hammering like a jackrabbit.

Oh, I was scared, all right. I was fucking terrified. It just wasn’t in the way he was thinking.

Dax was one of the most attractive guys in class. Lots of girls were interested in him, and would feel all aflutter to have his attention. But I didn’t feel that way. I didn’t look at Dax and see a teen heartthrob. I didn’t feel his arms around me and turn warm and goey. It just felt wrong… and I didn’t like it.

“Brooke…”

I’d always heard that a kiss is supposed to ignite sparks. Instead I only felt a sloppy, uncomfortable wet feeling in my mouth, and I wanted it gone as quickly as possible.

“I’m sorry. I don’t feel that way.”

It took all my willpower to not break down in tears right then and there.

I had to get away. As the tears started to leak from my eyes, I escaped at a full run up the main staircase and hid myself into the very back room.

And then I just broke down, really broke down.

“You what?”

“Ya… but it was like kissing a dead fish, you know? There was just… no response at all.”

“Woah… sorry dude.”

My safe haven was no safe haven at all. It was directly above the room my classmates were gathered in downstairs, and the rickety old house was crap at keeping the sound out. I could hear everything.

“Don’t feel bad, Dax, she’s never shown an interest in guys to me… you know… I’ve suspected for a while now she might be a lesbian, actually. She just won’t tell me. And I’m her best friend! I just wish she’d come out, you know?”

My tears poured down my cheeks. “But I’ve never found girls attractive either!” I blubbered to myself. “I’m not… I’m just… I’m just messed up! There’s something wrong with me! I feel so alone… No one understands…”

“I understand what it feels like to be alone. No one understands me, either.” There was a soft voice in the room, much too clear to be coming from the room below, and it had a sort of wispy tone… like a strained whisper, desperate to be heard.

I looked up through my blurry, tear-filled eyes. At first, I gasped, my heart stuttering. There was an ethereal figure in the room. This was the real deal. My instincts were telling me to run… because we run from what scares us, right? But right now… I was even scared of myself, because I didn’t understand myself. Maybe all this spirit had ever known was people fleeing because they didn’t understand, too.

Her face seemed friendly… but also carried a forlornness about it.

“Hi, I’m Brooke. What’s your name?”

“Christina. Christina Rowe.”

“You’re lonely, Christina?”

“Terribly.”

“Well, I can always use more friends. Want to come hang out at my house?”

She was more excited at that prospect than I’d expected, and couldn’t stop enthusiastically asking me questions as I went back downstairs.

“Brooke! Did you find anything upstairs?” Mia asked, likely trying to divert the topic from my failed romantic encounter in front of the group, though I could see in her eyes she was absolutely dying to get the details from me.

“Err… sort of…”

“Uhhhhhhhh… guys… I think we’d better–” Nathan was already bolting toward the door.

“YOU KIDS! EVERY YEAR YOU COME SNOOPING AROUND MY HOUSE WITHOUT PERMISSION! GET OUT BEFORE I GET THE SHOVEL!”

“–ruuuuuuuun!”

Christina and I became the closest of friends after that night. I really feel like I can open up to her about anything, which is why when I discovered AVEN and began to identify as an asexual, she was the one that really helped me through it all. In a world that still tends to believe by and large that asexuals “don’t exist,” she just… understood me. “Most people don’t believe in ghosts, either,” she would say with a chuckle.

Now I find it weird to even call her just a “friend.” She just feels like something… deeper to me, like our bonds are stronger than that. But I wouldn’t call her a girlfriend, either. It isn’t like we kiss and cuddle and all that sappy stuff. Obviously, I’m not comfortable with that… and well, this kind of works out, since she doesn’t have a physical body and all. For a time she was very self-conscious about that, until she realized I truly don’t mind. This bond we share together… it’s a love that works just fine for us, just the way we are.

But you know, when she’s really hurt, or upset, or scared… I’ll always comfort her, in the only way I know how. I may not exactly be a very physically intimate sort of person, but she says that when I put my arms around her, she can feel my body warmth pressing around her essense, and it soothes her. And that makes me feel all warm inside, despite the icy wind against my body.


This was written for the October Monthly Short Story Challenge from the Sims forums, which tasked folks to write a story in 500-2000 words using 1-15 screencaps using the theme “So Spooky.” I used 1,970 words and 15 screencaps. It is a completely stand-alone story, not using any characters from any of my other works (though there are many cameos from some of my other short stories… can you spot them all?)

This short story was also written for Asexuality Awareness Week 2016, which was celebrated October 23rd to 29th 2016. Asexuality Awareness Week is “an international campaign that seeks to educate about asexual, aromantic, demisexual, and grey-asexual experiences and to create materials that are accessible to our community and our allies around the world.” As an aromantic asexual myself that has gone through many of the feelings of confusion, guilt, loneliness, misunderstanding, and wondering just “What’s wrong with me?” that I tried to convey with Brooke in the limited amount of words I had, as well as being told, “You don’t like guys? Oh, you must be a lesbian!,” a common response many Aces get fed that Brooke’s friends immediately jumped to, this was an important story for me to tell. And there was so much more I wished I could’ve included, but there just isn’t the space in the short story format.

If you don’t know anything about asexuals (you wouldn’t be alone; it really is true most folks think we “don’t exist”!), I highly recommend you check out The Asexuality Visibility and Education Network or this great, very quick educational video by swankivy that gives a hit-and-run of many questions on the topic. Also, check out CathyTea’s Asexuality Awareness Week 2016 Tribute as well, where she interviews four of her Ace Sims!

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About Mastress Alita

I'm a fulltime librarian, a chronic migraineur, a tea addict, and an avid Simmer that writes SimLit and maintains the Stories and Legacies Index, a link directory of SimLit on Wordpress. Though I obviously love cats, I actually don't own one! (Blame my apartment lease for that!) I do have a charming old cockatiel, Kali, that has been my companion for the last seventeen years!
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23 Responses to Play Your Ace

  1. It’s posts like these that keep my spirit up. As a panromantic Ace, very few people actually understand me at all. I “came out” to my parents, my best friend, and my colleagues at work a few months back. Everyone was really supportive, although making jokes on the sidelines, but, that didn’t really phase me as I know that they don’t really “get it”. My best friend was the icing on the cake. She immediately went and check AVEN and actually realised that she, herself, was a demisexual! It was really freeing for her.

    But, this past week, I’ve come to realise that the same supportive people, really do think this is just a “phase”. One of my colleagues read us a story of a hetero woman who found out her man was cheating. In response she deleted his thesis and destroyed all physical copies as well. This to me is inexcusable, and I said so. Heck, if she had killed him or shot him or cut off vital pieces of anatomy, I wouldn’t have had the same reaction. In fact, I probably would have condoned that in a way, or at least have been able to empathise. The reaction was “oh but, you’ve never been in love so you don’t know what you’re talking about”. This irritated the crap out of me, becuase it made me realise that none of them had even taken the chance to really listen to what I said when I came out. how could they say I’ve never been in love?!? Just because I don’t have an interest in the physical side of a relationship, doesn’t mean I’ve never been in love! Truth be told, and this is the first time I’m saying this “out loud”, I’m in love with my best friend. I have been for most of our friendship. It is literally painful to me when she enters a new relationship because I wish it was me. But, I could never tell her that because I don’t think she sees me the same way, and I don’t want to potentially lose her friendship. It keeps me sane (or at least as sane as a Bipolar 1 individual can be). So, when I read a story like this, it really keeps me going. At least there are people out in Internet-land who know that you can be in love without having a physical attraction or a need to have sex with the object of you affections! I think the only person who really understood, other than my BFF, was the gay guy at work. He is one of the most amazing people, a really diva, and the only person who took the time to take me aside and say they completely understood and supported me 100% (other than my BFF that is).

    Ok, babble fest over… This story was brilliant and I would give it an award if I could!
    Sent via my BlackBerry from Vodacom – let your email find you!

    Liked by 2 people

    • Thank you so much for your story, magpie. I feel like at the time of Sims Pride you were still questioning your asexuality and I’m glad that you’ve found an orientation identity where everything makes sense in your world and you’ve even told your friends and family about it. That’s a really huge step! And I’m glad you have some really supportive people in your life in the form of your BFF and your gay mate; keep them close, cause that support is invaluable!

      I have shared many of your experiences! Both huge allies of anything and everything LGBTQ+, I have always had a lot of understanding and support from my sister when I started telling my family, but the other members of my family have just kind of rolled it off, never really “had a conversation” with me about it, and over all just act like it isn’t a part of me or doesn’t exist, and is “just a phase” exactly as you are describing. My best friend just happens to be the opposite gender, is also asexual, lives in another state, and we meet up a few times a year to go on vacations together, and it seems some of my family still seems disillusioned that we aren’t more than “just friends” or that one day finally I’m going to hit that magical “sexual awakening” and we are going to be an item. Except, ya know, I’m well on my way to the big 4-0 and I’m pretty sure that would’ve happened by now. But I think they will just keep on holding out that it’s “a phase.” A really, really, really long one until I meet that fabled “right person.”

      I’ve also received comments about “but you wouldn’t understand, you’ve never been in love” so I well understand the sting. It’s strange how people seem to understand easily how sex can exist without love, but love can’t exist without sex! Of course I’ve been in love before. I know that pain just as well as anyone else. I experience love now, too. There are lots of different forms of love, because love is a beautiful and multi-faceted thing, just as there are all sorts of amazing kinds of relationships and partnerships that provide different comfort to people.

      I also know how hard it can be when you feel those strong feelings of love for another when they feel a different sort of love back. My way of working through this, and this was after years and going through a lot of pain and struggle, was realizing that these people I felt so deeply for were always going to need something I couldn’t provide anyway (a sexual experience), and I needed to embrace their need to have that in their life for them to be fully happy, and because as a loving individual, I wanted nothing but their full happiness, and then just extended my asexual need for lots of friendships to their partners. I tried to make it clear, “Hey, I’d like to hang out with you and your boyfriend sometime, I’d like to get to know him” and once he got to know me too and all of us had fun together playing video games, things became easier. Widening my circle of love, rather than shrinking myself into my feelings of jealousy like I had for so long, was the only way I was able to finally work my way through it… and it was not easy. Not at all. I really wish I could say it was. But I’m also glad that I did it.

      If you ever feel the need to talk to me about anything, my e-mail is always open and located on my About Me page.

      Liked by 1 person

      • Thanks so much. I think the jealousy is more for the fact that her past relationships could be open about it. She was with a guy (real douche) and no one questioned it because they met at work. She was with a woman (severely clingy to the point of suffocation) and no one had an issue. But, they could be open because they did not start off with having her friendship, so it wasn’t theirs to lose…
        We stay a good 7 hours drive from each other, but, we try to text every second day at the least. We always end off with “love you mwahugz” and have for years.
        I have always tried to get to know her partners as I have felt that if they are important to her then they are important to me and I just want her to be happy. Which is another reason I keep quiet about how I feel. I’m the one person she can be open and honest with, who doesn’t have some hidden agenda or want something from her (yes, I do appreciate the irony lol) and I would help her hide the body if it ever came to that. Not that I know who’s body it would be?!?! Body? What body? I never saw nobody?
        I think her last partner had an inkling though, because, she used to get very insecure whenever I would visit (bearing in mind that for me to visit would only be practical for an week or two stay due to the distance) and would forever try to slip in some snide little remarks or comments.
        I guess it is telling that I’m the one still in her life and not the other one though…
        Anyway, I’m totally not sure what I was trying to put across when I started writing this, but, thanks for the support, and I will definitely e-mail if I need to *hugs*

        Liked by 1 person

  2. cathytea says:

    I love all the ways you touch upon spooky! And the spirit friendship is so awesome ! With our societal focus on sexual attraction, I often feel that spiritual attraction is overlooked , and for me, that’s the powerful attraction . I’m glad you linked to that video ! I really appreciate it. And thanks for linking to my interviews!

    Liked by 1 person

    • It was definitely a challenge as I was trying to think, all month, of how I could combine the Short Story Challenge theme of “So Spooky” with something for Asexuality Awareness Week, as I realized that with my health, there was no way I was going to be able to do two separate short stories and I’d been planning since last year to do something for AAW!

      In the end, though, I was happy enough with how it turned out (other than wishing I had even more words to work with, hahaha) because at least from my own experience, I find my love tends to be exactly that — that love that is attached to a person’s soul, heart to heart, and the body doesn’t matter to me at all, so this human/ghost relationship helped me illustrate that in a very real way, by stripping the body away entirely and showing the soul beneath and how that doesn’t change the love at all. Maybe one day I’ll have a chance to reexplore these two (first ever TS3 Ambrosia Challenge? ^_~ )

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Hello Sara. I am glad to see you here and you are back !
    I wished to write something for the contest but I completely missed it. I had troubles with my game , crashes due to the same sims3pack and package files etc.

    Tough to be understood indeed by people when we are under the ace-umbrella and sometimes I hate me for being like this. I hate being a demisexual and I think it’s not a blessing and people even me are confused. Because we are very debatable and I even think it’s just something crazy.I don’t really trust it’s a real orientation sometimes, it’s not as clear as completely asexual. people who are clearly asexual and aromantic are clear, the only need a real friendship , they can’t interact romantically with a person .I am not as clear as that. I live into a cloud, with and without , between two waters.It’s not possible to be really like this. I can find people attractive but in fact I have any real attraction. I want I don’t want.How can people can’t laugh at me and say you don’t exist , you’re just a cold heterosexual .
    It’s very weird to be as I am.
    And if I want to speak , nobody really smile at me , we’re not as aware as in USA here , I even if AVEN France exists.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Actually, there *is* a French AVEN forum, and I am sure you will find a large, supportive community of demisexuals to chat with in your native language about your struggles that can help you out, Simsophonique. Their French forum is located here: http://www.asexuality.org/fr/forum/. Asexuality is on a spectrum, and there are plenty of gray aces and demisexuals out there that have probably struggled with a lot of the same feelings and insecurities. They are certainly real, valid orientations, and there is nothing crazy about the way you feel. I think you should give the forums a look.

      Like

      • I exist and I can’t change. However I sometimes think we are not legit because we are sitted between two chairs, sometimes we are totally ace, sometimes we want sex and it’s a fear , a repulsion and even an obsession.
        Nothing is clear about us and that the reason why we are so debatable, we exist sure , we struggle a lot.
        Thank you for the link , I will glance at it as soon as possible. I hope they are place to meet the association for real with real people as in every other pride. Forums make me feel so alone , I really need to speak to real people.
        We understood the aros and the aces because a part of us is exactly like them.The only difference is the matter of desire of romantism and of sex that is a little bit more intense.
        I did a testing in a ace site I cant remember which one, I just remember the site was in English and white at the background, it claims I am 60-64% ace and 74% demi. I did both.
        I never do sex, I can’t tell you exactly who I am between the two. For sure I am in the ace umbrella.

        Liked by 1 person

  4. Todd Allis says:

    I love that she’s in a spooky haunted house with a real ghost, and what’s weird and scary is something entirely different. It contrasts nicely with the allosexuals who are afraid of the ghost.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Truly probably the most spooky part about the “so spooky” theme is how misunderstood/unknown asexuality still is in society.

      Though I did find it funny that at the very end she and the ghost go to a fake carnival haunted house, and it was the *ghost* that got scared from it, hahaha! That made me laugh when that happened in game, so I had to squeeze those screenshots in somehow.

      Like

  5. Idiot says:

    I for one don’t understand asexuality. Getting sex is already hard enough, a lot of people are asexuals but not by choice. Unfortunately the will to reproduce is in our genes and it’s usually very strong. I wish I was asexual, everything would be easier. Anyway, good luck.

    Like

    • It is very obvious you don’t understand asexuality, nor looked at any of the educational resources I linked, such as this video which explain it very clearly. You seem to be equating asexuality to celibacy or abstinance, a choice to not have sex, and it has absolutely nothing to do with that. You are equating attraction with activity, which is entirely false. Asexuality is not experiencing sexual attraction. A heterosexual experiences sexual attraction towards the opposite gender, but does not experience sexual attraction toward the same gender. This is easy to understand, yes? For an asexual, there is no sexual attraction felt for either gender. Many asexuals don’t have sex because they don’t experience sexual attraction and therefore don’t feel the need or desire for it, but there are some that still do. Just like there is a wide variety of people in any other sexual orientation, there are for asexuals, as well.

      Also, I disagree that everyone has the will to reproduce. I know many people that don’t, of all sexualities. My sister, a pansexual in a longterm committed relationship with a man, being one. She has absolutely zero desire or interest in children. And there are plenty of other people out there that feel the same. Not everyone has this drive and desire and it isn’t linked to sexual orientation.

      As for saying “Everything would be easier if I were asexual,” that is rather hurtful to the many asexuals who have been shunned for who they are, misunderstood, not taken seriously, treated like they don’t exist, told it is “just a phase,” made to feel like there is something wrong with them, kicked out of social groups, experienced “gay hate” for being “different,” and countless other painful experiences. Not being heteronormative is never easy. There are plenty of other LGBT+ people that say, “If only I were…” every day, too. I used to say plenty of times, “If only I were…” until I realized who I was and accepted myself. It’s really hurtful to the community to say things like that without even understanding who these people are and the kinds of things they go through.

      Like

  6. I enjoyed this chapter, and I admire you for tackling this subject. It is important for all perspectives to be respected. Unwanted sexual advances are never okay, and I felt bad for Brooke, and annoyed at the rest of the teens for talking about her behind her back. I’m glad things turned out okay for Brooke. That house was indeed spooky/creepy. :)

    Liked by 1 person

    • And actually the experiences Brooke went through (the hand-holding, cuddling, and that first kiss) and her feelings of “this isn’t right” were based on my own experiences back when I was eighteen with my first boyfriend (I really wish I had more words with the short story format to have gotten to flesh things out a bit more, but with only 2k, I had to edit a lot!) The things her friends were saying behind her back were things I was told, too (admittedly to my face, when I didn’t know “what was wrong with me”… a sign of how lacking asexual education is). So a lot of the things that ended up in here were from personal experience, just shoehorned into the spooky house setting, hahaha.

      Like

  7. This was a very interesting story. I liked the different takes on spooky and Brooke’s fear of being intimate when she has no attraction to anyone in that manner. It was nice to see her find a true friend who understands and just “gets it,” which most people just don’t. The spiritual,friendship is very sweet. You’re very courageous to share a story like this, especially when the subject matter is something you, yourself, have experience with. This is especially true when such experiences and feelings don’t fit into the “norm” of society’s standards.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thanks Sweetnightingale. It’s a topic that the complexities of can’t really be done justice in 2k words and I hope I can revisit these characters again one day and do a proper story series when I have more time, but I really wanted to do something for Asexuality Awareness Week last October.

      Liked by 1 person

      • Admittedly, it’s a subject I can’t really relate to but it’s probably one that’s starting to get some recognition. I can’t imagine what it’s like to be in your shoes, but I admire you for being able to be very open about it. You write the subject matter admirably, and I’m sure you’ll get to revisit the characters at some point.

        I can only imagine what must be going through your head when you see romance being a main theme for a story, mine being perfect examples. LOL. It must be kinda hard to get through being it’s something you can’t really identify with in real life.

        Liked by 1 person

      • Many asexuals still experience romance and engage in romantic relationships, they just don’t experience sexual attraction. They may have certain romantic attractions and identify as a heteroromantic asexual, for example. Some asexuals, however, don’t feel romantic attraction either, and identify as aromantic asexuals (I fit in this category) so there is actually a wide spectrum of asexuality. “Love” and “sexual attraction” are very different things, and many people make the very false assumption Aces are incapable of love… they love in many varied ways. Aces in general aren’t “anti” romance or even “anti” sex just because it is something they don’t care for in their own lives (and some Aces actually engage in sexual acts; behavior does not equate orientation!). I do find however the lack of other relationships in fiction (strong friendships seem to always have to develop into romance, and romance seems to always have to develop into sexual relationships) is a bit staggering… there are rarely, if ever, actually “Ace” characters, and friendships in general seem to be downplayed. There is just still a lot of lack of education in general about this particular identity (you rarely, if ever, see asexual as a “choice” on sexual orientation fields, which usually only list “straight, gay, or bi.”) I just hope with more education and awareness that things will continue to evolve in the future… there are surprisingly a lot of Aces in the Simming community!

        Liked by 1 person

  8. Ah, I see! So in many ways, there are “degrees” of asexuality. Makes sense since very rarely does something fit “neatly” into one category.

    I guess I hadn’t really thought much about it, but you’re right about the lack of other relationships taking center stage in fiction. Strong friendships can be had without it turning romantic. My stories tend to have quite a lot of romance but I’m planning some chapters where friendships between characters will take center stage. I like developing different relationships between characters, and it’s always nice to see how the different dynamics come into it. One of my pet peeves is when someone has a friend of the opposite sex and it’s always assumed that they’re “doing something” when it’s entirely untrue.

    One thing’s for sure, the Simming community is very diverse.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Yes, that is one of my pet peeves too… I see it on television shows most often, how it seems the writers of TV series seem unable to just write male/female friendships, as if they somehow don’t or can’t exist, or as you say, they must “have something going on” (and I find this odd as I would say I have more male friends than female ones!) My family still thinks that me and my best friend must be “seeing each other” just because we are the opposite gender… we just laugh about it to this day (we’ve been BFFs for 13+ years now). We are both Aces, friends for life, and find it comical they just can’t seem to get that we can simply “be friends” after all this time. (As if something as important as friendship should ever be defined by something like gender…)

      And yes, the Simming community is very diverse, and amazing. So glad to be a part of it!

      Liked by 1 person

      • Oh, totally! TV shows are definitely the worst in that area. I hate how this kind of thing is so often misconstrued. I have both male and female friends and it annoys the crap out of me when people try to twist it into something it’s not. It’s certainly less complicated when it’s simply BFF – I’ve seen friendships go terribly wrong when it does turn into a romantic relationship that ends up not working out.

        Yep, same here. :) It’s great to be among so many talented and different people.

        Liked by 1 person

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